KyKurmudgeon

Wednesday’s column:

Attorney General Jack Conway screwed up, but not because he spiced his Fancy Farm Picnic speech with a few salty words. Conway’s screw-up came when he apologized for the speech.

Conway and Lt. Gov. Daniel Mongiardo, his chief rival for the Democratic nomination in the 2010 U.S. Senate race, both performed well at Fancy Farm. They were the stars of the show. Everyone else played supporting roles.

But at the end of the day, my scorecard had Conway ahead on points, precisely because of his salty language.

You see, the knock on Conway from his critics has always been that he’s just a rich guy with good looks but little substance. Such a condescending characterization implies some level of weakness, some lack of steel on Conway’s part. Mongiardo’s frequent references to “silver spoon” issues in his own speech sought to exploit that image.

By calling Mongiardo out with the “you sure as hell can’t speak the truth” line and by responding to hecklers by describing himself — himself, not anyone else — as “one tough son of a bitch,” Conway added a previously unseen “edge” to his image, an edge that would serve him well in a hard-fought primary and perhaps in an even harder-fought general election.

Some considered his salty words inappropriate because of the setting where they were uttered — a church fund-raising event. Well, I’m a big fan of Fancy Farm (and a huge fan of the food they serve). But with all due respect to the good folks of St. Jerome Parish, when the political speaking commences, it ain’t no church picnic anymore.

Not with raucous (dare I say irreverent?) crowds from both parties shouting down the speakers. And members of this particular congregation aren’t yelling “Amen!” and “Praise the Lord!” I can’t point to a specific instance, but I would be extremely surprised if a few salty words haven’t spiced up some of these confrontations at previous picnics.

Although the crowd annually is admonished (semi-jokingly) to mind its manners, no serious attempt is made to control the heckling. Nor should there be. Fancy Farm wouldn’t be Fancy Farm without audience participation. But as long as the rowdies are allowed to run riot verbally, no one should go all holier than thou if a speaker drops a cuss word or two into the conversation.

So, Conway’s words held no shock value for me. On the contrary, I took them as a display of backbone that elevated his stature in my eyes.

I left the picnic thinking Conway remains vulnerable on “cap and trade” in a coal state, at least until he takes a more definitive position than he has voiced so far. And a Duke Blue Devil may have some explaining to do to the Wildcat fans among Kentucky voters.

But I also left thinking it might be wise of Mongiardo to ease up on the “silver spoon” references in the future, because the Jack Conway on the stage at Fancy Farm seemed perfectly capable of taking that figurative spoon and filing it down into a figurative shiv he could use in a political street fight.

Had Conway chosen to weather the overreaction that followed his speech, his campaign probably would be the better for it today.

Since you can’t take back words once they leave your lips, whatever damage he might suffer from having uttered them was already done. Why compound the problem by backpedaling, which could only be seen by voters and by his opponents as a sign of weakness?

But that was the path Conway chose. He apologized, losing the edge the speech added to his image. And the figurative shiv morphed back into a spoon.

KyKurmudgeon spent last week exiled from work, and from getting paid. Such are the lives of journalists in these lousy economic days. They have to learn new things, such as how to file for unemployment.

Since I couldn’t check my office e-mail or voice mail while serving my figurative time on Elba, it has taken some time to catch up today.

It appears I missed a bit of fun, what with the whole flap about Attorney General Jack Conway’s Fancy Farm speech. I’ll have a couple of thoughts on that subject in Wednesday’s column.

The 129th Annual Fancy Farm Picnic drew what seemed to me a smaller crowd than normal, possibly because there are no statewide elections this year. Here, in no particular order, are a few observations.

Among the notables in attendance (other than the speakers): Louisville Mayor Jerry Abramson, Gov. Steve Beshear’s 2011 running mate, worked the crowd accompanied by his son. And the only declared candidate to replace the erstwhile “Mayor for Life,” businessman Greg Fisher, who lost to Bruce Lunsford in the 2008 Democratic U.S. Senate primary, was also there with his son. But I doubt he found many folks who can vote in the Louisville mayoral race at this Western Kentucky event.

Former Gov. Paul Patton was on the grounds, maintaining “contacts,” as was former U.S. Rep. Carroll Hubbard. A number of state legislators who attended interim committee meetings in Mayfield late in the week stuck around for the barbecue and bombast.

Perennial candidate Gatewood Galbraith, who says he will run for governor as an Independent in 2011, was there with a following of supporters wearing yellow T-shirts with the slogan “Now is the Time” on the back.

And I had the good fortune of scarfing down the wonderful barbecue and fresh veggies in the company of former state Sen. and former state Supreme Court Justice Walter Baker and a few of his Glasgow pals. Very entertaining company.

Although the food was excellent, as always, the signs and the political theater that usually show some wonderful creativity were rather blah this year. A few of the T-shirts were a bit better.

“This Rand is Your Rand” shirts were worn by backers of Rand Paul, son of former presidential candidate and U.S. Rep. Ron Paul. Secretary of State Trey Grayson’s supporters sported a rather blah “Run Trey Run” shirt. And I saw several shirts that featured a variation on the standard “No Smoking” (or whatever) symbol that had the circle and slash covering the single word “JERRY.” I suspect these were representatives of labor.

But the most creative T-shirt I saw featured this statement on the back:

“I’M A DEMOCRAT
YOU’RE A REPUBLICAN
LET’S BE FRIENDS
I’LL HUG YOUR ELEPHANT
YOU KISS MY ASS!!”

Whew! It got hot at Saturday’s 129th Annual Fancy Farm Picnic, but not from the weather. A fairly constant breeze kept the mid-80s temps tolerable.

What got hot was the race between Lt. Gov. Daniel Mongiardo and Attorney General Jack Conway for the 2010 Democratic nomination for U.S. senator. They went after each other with a passion that assures this will not be the polite Democratic primary contest Kentuckians witnessed in the 2007 gubernatorial campaign. And Secretary of State Trey Grayson must be loving it, because the Republican frontrunner stands to benefit from any fracture the D’s suffer as a result of a heated Mongiardo-Conway race.

Mongiardo took the first shot, reminding the crowd, “Jack Conway is a proud Duke Blue Devil, and I’m a proud Kentucky Wildcat.” And that was one of the nicer things he said about Conway.

“I may be a doctor and lieutenant governor,” he said, “but I certainly wasn’t born with a silver spoon in my mouth. In the Senate I’m going to stand up for people who eat barbecue with a fork, not caviar with a silver spoon.”

“Silver spoon” was a constant theme of his speech. “Jack is a nice guy, but he chooses to fight for silver spoon issues preferred by the champaign and caviar crowd.”

Mongiard also attacked Conway on the cap-and-trade issue. “Jack’s energy tax is a job killer,” he said.

“I went there before Christian Laettner,” Conway said in response to the Duke reference, “and I’ll take this pledge. Joe B. Hall is running around out here somewhere. If it will help you out and make you feel better, I’ll pledge to lay down in front of these cameras, and we’ll let Joe b. stomp on my chest.”

In regard to Mongiardo’s other attacks, Conway said, “Dan, you may be an ear, nose and throat doctor; but you’ve misdiagnosed me. When it comes to me, you can’t hear the truth, you can’t smell the truth, and you sure as hell can’t speak the truth.”

Both men tried to verbally connect themselves to Wendell Ford, the former governor and U.S. senator from Western Kentucky. Conway even quoted him in a feisty response to the vocal crowd that tried to drown out his speech. “You all can holler all you want at me,” he said, “and I can hear you. But it’s like Wendell used to say … go ahead and chew on my hide. Chew on it. It only grows back tougher. And I’ve been around awhile, and you’re looking at one tough son of a bitch.”

On the cap-and-trade issue, Conway pledge to never cast a vote that hurt coal “and you have my word on that today.”

Those two fired-up speeches make the oratory of other declared and potential Senate candidates seem a bit tame. Grayson’s best line in an OK speech came after he congratulated Mongiardo (whose wife is pregnant with their first child) and Conway, whose wife recently delivered their first child.

“You all will love being parents,” said Grayson, the father of two young daughters. “The good news is that babies eventually sleep regularly. The even better news is that after November 2010, you will have plenty of time to spend with your families.

Among the Tier 2 candidates, Democrat Darlene Fitzgerald Price impressed me a bit by delivering a spirited speech extemporaneously. Her main theme was that government has been bought by “the bigs” - various industries and special interest groups. If members of Congress were in NASCAR, she said, they would have to wear the names of their sponsor on their sleeves and a big “For Sale” on their bumper. She punctuated the latter remark by pointing at her posterior.

Republican businessman Bill Johnson also delivered his remarks off the cuff. The 10-year military veteran said, “My job now it to fight the domestic enemies, and there are a lot of them.” When someone in the crowd shouted out President Barack Obama’s name, Johnson said, “And Obama is one of them.” He also said the entire Democratic Pary is a “wrecking crew.”

Maurice Sweeney, an African-American businessman from Jefferson County with roots in Western Kentucky, descibed himself as a “conservative Democrat.” He said most politicians are predictable. “With me, you can’t guess what you’ll get,” he said, which is an unusual pitch for votes.

Rand Paul, the son of former presidential candidate and U.S. Rep Ron Paul who is expected to officially enter the Republican primary in the near future, failed to impress me. He accused both parties of hypocrisy, and criticized Congress for passing a bank bailout bill no one had read.

He also described Conway as “the epitome of a career politician” because, after a 30-minute discussion of the cap-and-trade issue, Paul claimed he had “no idea” what Conway said. Thing is, though, Conway is in the second year of his first term in elective office. Paul has every right to criticize Conway for obfuscation if Conway hemmed and hawed on the discussion of an issue. But “career politician”? Not! At least, not yet.

Lt. Gov. Daniel Mongiardo will lead off the political speechifying at Saturday’s 129th Annual Fancy Farm Picnic. He will be followed by Attorney General Jack Conway and Secretary of State Trey Grayson. All three are announced candidates for the 2010 U.S. Senate race.

They will be followed to the podium by four other announced or potential candidates: Rand Paul, Darlene Fitzgerald Price, Bill Johnson and Maurice Sweeney. Their order of appearance will be determined by coin flip.

After the Senate candidates have made their pitch, state Auditor Crit Luallen, Treasurer Todd Hollenback, state Sen. Ken Winters and state Reps. Fred Nesler and Steven Rudy will appear in that order.

All speakers will be limited to five minutes.

Thanks, as always, to Mark Wilson, chairman of the political portion of the picnic, for providing the info.

Ol’ Kurmudgeon took some time off earlier this week to compensate for spending the weekend on the job at the 129th Annual Fancy Farm Picnic. I’ll be on that long road to Western Kentucky Friday.

But I’ve already written Sunday’s column on the obvious topic of the week, and it should post automatically Sunday morning. And I’ll be blogging about the politicking (and maybe a bit about the yummy food) Saturday afternoon and evening.

If you’re also headed that way and see me at the picnic or on the streets of Paducah in the evenings, come up and say howdy. Hope to see a lot of you there.

Calling all golfers! Or at least all D golfers. The Graves County Democratic Executive Committee will co-host a golf scramble two days before the 129th Annual Fancy Farm Picnic. The scramble begins at 9 a.m. Thursday, July 30, at South Highland Country Club. Contact Romey Holmes at 270-623-8078. (Thanks to Holly Erwin for passing the info along.)

And add state Auditor Crit Luallen to the list of confirmed speakers during the political oratory portion of the Aug. 1 picnic.

At the official kickoff of his re-election campaign Monday, Gov. Steve Beshear said he will not attend this year’s 129th Annual Fancy Farm Picnic. He will be on a family vacation instead. Beshear’s new running mate, Louisville Mayor Jerry Abramson, will attend the Aug. 1 picnic but will not be one of the speakers.

So far, the confirmed speakers include Lt. Gov. Daniel Mongiardo, Secretary of State Trey Grayson, state Treasurer Todd Hollenbach, state Sen. Ken Winters, state Reps. Fred Nesler and Steven Rudy. In addition to Mongiardo and Grayson, three other candidates in the 2010 U.S. Senate race are on the program: Republicans Rand Paul (a Bowling Green ophthalmologist) and Bill Johnson (a Todd County businessman) and Democrat Darlene Fitzgerald Price (a former Customs agent).

Fayette County Democrats will have a Fayette Friends at Fancy Farm gathering the morning of the 129th annual picnic. It starts at 10:30 a.m. (CDT) at Happy House Restaurant, 236 North 8th Street, Mayfield.

If you can’t get enough food and speechifying at the 129th Annual Fancy Farm Picnic Aug. 1, the two major political parties have a few other events planned for the weekend. (All times Central Daylight Time.)

Democrats start first with the Pennyrile Garden Party from 3-5 p.m. CDT at the home of state Rep. Mike Cherry and Princeton Mayor Gale Cherry, 803 South Jefferson St., Princeton.

Later, each party will throw a shindig in Marshall County.

For the Democrats, it’s the Marshall County Bean Supper at the Kentucky Dam Village Convention Center in Gilbertsville from 6-8 p.m.

Meanwhile, the Marshall County GOP Women will be hosting the Republicans ‘Nite Before Fancy Farm Picnic at the Calvert City Civic Center, 1445 5th Avenue SE, Calvert City. It also kicks off at 6 p.m.

Saturday morning, each party will gather for breakfast in Graves County.

D’s will be at Mayfield High School, 700 Douthitt St., Mayfield, starting at 8 a.m.

R’s will be at Graves County High School, Exit 24 Purchase Parkway, also at 8 a.m.

As always, if you don’t get your fill (of food and entertainment) at these events and the picnic, I recommend Paducah’s “Downtown After Dinner” Saturday night. Music in the streets and some very good restaurants.

And I assume the Bank of Benton will have its annual “Watermelon Bust” that evening at Marshall County High School.

UPDATE: Thanks to the reader who informed us that the former Bank of Benton is now the Community Financial Services Bank and that the Watermelon Bust begins at 5 p.m. Aug. 1.