KyKurmudgeon

Sunday’s column:

I now have had THAT experience. The experience where dealing honestly with government bureaucracy just gets you screwed — royally.

The experience that makes a person think about packing a few necessities — definitely including multiple firearms and a lifetime supply of ammo — and heading for the hills to live a survivalist life because they can’t screw you if they can’t find you.

OK, that thought didn’t last long in my mind because the modest hunting and fishing skills of my youth long since faded away. These days, I wouldn’t last any longer in the wilderness than it would take me to stumble into the first patch of poison ivy.

But back to THAT experience.

As regular readers are aware, Uncle Herald has tightened his belt a bit lately, and not just by reducing the size of the paper. Multiple rounds of buyouts and layoffs have now led to the F word.

Furloughs. One week of unpaid furloughs for all. I bit the bullet the week of Aug. 3, a decision I now regret.

Uncle Herald’s work week runs from Monday through Sunday, and the Fancy Farm Picnic prompted me to work Wednesday through Sunday the week before I went on furlough.

Since unpaid furlough qualifies a person to collect unemployment insurance, I went online at home Aug. 3 and filed my claim, in the process honestly responding to a question by reporting that the last day I worked was Aug. 2.
Filing the claim went smoothly, and I was informed at the end of the process that I could start requesting my check Aug. 16.

A few days later, I received a letter from the Education and Workforce Development Cabinet telling me the amount of benefits I would be eligible to receive.

Requesting my check proved a bit more difficult.

When I went online to do so Aug. 16, the system kept stopping me at a particular point in the process with a message that was incomprehensible to me. Same result when I tried again the next day. So, off to the unemployment office I went.

After registering, I chatted with an acquaintance for the last half-hour of her three-hour wait to be seen. Then, I settled in for my own long wait.

But an hour or so later, a lady walked in and told a man at the registration counter she was having trouble completing a form online. He directed her to one of the computers in the office, and told her he would come help her when she encountered her problem.

I asked if he would do the same for me, and he agreed. When he showed me what I needed to do, I learned that, for unemployment purposes, the work week runs Sunday through Saturday and that, because I had worked Sunday, Aug. 2, I had to report my earnings for that day. I did, and was able to complete the process.

Then, I asked the guy if reporting those earnings would reduce my benefits. He said it would but it would be a “wash” because I had earnings that week.

I tried to explain about Uncle Herald’s Monday-Sunday work week and that my furlough would cost me a full week’s wages. But for whatever reason, I couldn’t get him to understand. He just smiled, handed me a pamphlet, suggested I read it and turned his attention to someone else.

I walked away feeling certain I was screwed. Sure enough, when the check arrived a couple of days later, it was for less than half the amount the earlier letter said I was eligible to receive.

Could the outcome have been different if I had dealt with someone else at the unemployment office? I don’t know.

Maybe there are ways to make the system accommodate the fact that not all work weeks run from Sunday through Saturday. Maybe not.

Could I have appealed to someone higher in the Education and Workforce Development Cabinet? Perhaps.

A columnist at one of the state’s larger media outlets ought to be able to get a return call from the cabinet. But Joe Sixpack might not. Therefore, making the call that might prompt the return call would be taking advantage of my position, which is an ethical no-no for a journalist.

So, I just cashed my small check and learned my lesson from getting screwed for answering a bureaucratic question truthfully. If Uncle Herald decides more furloughs are in our future, you can be darn sure I won’t take mine the week after working a Sunday.